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Believe, Faith

I blog about Life few weeks ago, cause since my dad's surgery, i had been thinking alot, alot, alot about this issue.

According to the bible, our life expectancy is 70-80 years, i'm 20+ this year, means i have live more than one quarter of my life, so i left with probably 50-60 years life, or if Jesus came back before this, or i finish my work on Earth and God wants me to go back to Him, then probably the duration will be shorter. So what had i done in the past 20+ years?? Growing up, going to school, finish primary then secondary school, then proceed to medical school, finish theory years, then clinical years and now that had reach the end of my tertiary study. One last final professional exam and i'll start the new chapter of my life.

Relationship wise, i have awesome family, awesome church members, many people who loves me. My parents had witness my grown up since i'm young, they love me, educate me, provide me all my needs, giving me money to spend and praying for my future so i can have a good life. My boyfriend, Nick, whom i met more than 2 years ago when i first came to Seremban continue my clinical school training, he had shown me unlimited loves, he loves me take care of me and show me the meaning of living a higher standard of life. He teach me how to dress nicely, encourage me and give me the best thing he can give. We gone through many circumstances together, praying together for difficult situation, helping each other pass through the bad days....Ya, I really thanks God for putting him in my life, and our 2 years anniversary is in few days time.

Spiritually, i used to be an active church member, i grown up in church, go church every Sunday since young, when i'm young, i go Sunday school, or in my church we call it Children service. Then i went to Youth service, serve as leader until i enrol in IMU, which i left my hometown and start my study in KL, then Seremban. I love God, i know God exist, i know whenever i'm in difficult situation, i can always cry out to God and He is always there for me. I believe in Heaven and Hell, i believe in End of the World, i believe that Jesus is my saviour and i believe in Eternity.
But, few years down the road, although i still planted in church, i still attend church, and even serve in church, help in church ministry, i know my faith had reduce, yeah, in my deep instinct, i believe God, but the way i carry out my life, it's just a different story. I'm portray as a Christian that go church every week in front of everyone, but deep in my heart, i always know this is Not enough. This is NOT the purpose of my life. I didn't not read bible properly as i should, i didn't pray as much as i should, i read bible for a short while or whenever i felt guilty for not reading for very long. I pray to God when i'm facing difficult situation. I did not preach gospel to my friends, and worst still, i sin against God by telling lies, playing tricks on people, being arrogant, being selfish and talking bad about others. Yeah this show how bad i m as the creator of God and God's children.

I work in hospital, i witness life and death all the time, i learn about many many disease, i learn about mortality and morbidity, i know in which condition, we may lose a patient if we don't act immediately. I was posted in delivery suite and witness as well as deliver baby, the new life. I was expose to many ethical n professionalism talks, which talk about abortion, euthanasia, announcing brain death, organ donation, prescribing medications with serious side effects, etc. I was posted in a Cancer institute, learning about how to deal with people who reach end of life, learning about pain relief, chemotherapy, radiotherapy. But i didn't learn about how should i live, and what's my future will be like?

We all know, one day we will die, one day we will no longer be this young and we will no longer have the luxury of living or do whatever we like. This day will come, like it or not. On the day when i heard about my dad's condition, and when i know that my dad will be going through a major operation, i was terrified. I was in Batu Pahat during that time, my dad is in Ipoh. One north, one south. I know i could not get back on time to be with my dad throughout the operation. I went back 2 days after my dad's operation, my dear boyfriend Nick fetch me back to Ipoh. And during my stay in the hospital, my dad needs to undergo the second operation, i was there waiting outside the operation room, then staying in High Dependency Unit with my dad, staying up the whole night witnessing many many other ill patient in the room.

During that time, i really thankful that i have God. Because God, i have peace, i was not so chaotic as i used to be, i had seen how strong is my mum in coping with this situation, she's really a very very good example for me.

Then my dad pass through both operation uneventfully, everything is fine, just he need to rest at home for about one month before going back to work. Now he had gone back to work, but because need to drive long distance to work, my mum drive him to his workplace everyday. I always wonder how can my mum be so strong and so inspiring, i know she believe in God and all her strength come from God. I realize how wonderful is my God and how lucky m i being a christian.
On top of all these, because during these period, i started to ponder, why i exist in this world? I always know there is eternity, so i was thinking, how long is eternity? What is eternity? And what kind of life will i have in eternity. Then, i read through the book of Revelation in bible, Rev 4:11 says we all are the creator of God, and our God deserve all the glory and honour. Then i continue my life for one month, then this testimony was shared, read here, Chinese version i dono online got or not, but i got the soft copy, so i post on my blog here.

It's about a Korean pastor being brought to heaven and hell. This is NOT just a story which created to scare people, it's a true story, it very very real, i believe in it, because in my opinion, there is no one can write out such real story if it's not a real experience. People, Heaven and Hell is very very true. I fear God, i want to be the one that have house in Heaven.

Read the following from an online article, post here to share with everyone...

Who is God? God simply IS. And... He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him. You will find Him in the pages of the Bible. Continue to read His Word and pray to Him and have fellowship with like-minded believers.

To come to Him, pray with me, with your whole heart....

"Father in heaven, I am a sinner. I was born into a fallen world that is at war with you. I have been at war with you. I have sinned against you Heavenly Father, and am no longer worthy to be called your child. Yet, as an act of faith - not in anything good in me, but in the goodness that is in Jesus Christ alone - I confess my sin.
I turn from the false gods of this world and I will serve you alone, as revealed in your Holy Word, The Bible. Cleanse me of my past. Wash me clean from the sin and pollution of my poor choices. Deliver me from the power of the evil one, and set my feet on the firm path of salvation. I confess my sins.... (name the one's the Lord brings to your heart) and I ask to be forgiven once and for all for them.
I receive the righteousness of Jesus Christ, and clothe myself in it by faith in Him. I receive the gift of salvation and the responsibility to walk uprightly in the power of your spirit. No longer will I pursue the pulls of the flesh. Fill me now with your Holy Spirit. Create a new heart in me. Former things are passed away, and I am now made new! Thank you Holy Father! Thank you Jesus! I will follow you forever, and ever, in Jesus' name, amen."
Congratulations on becoming a Christian!! You are now on the road to Salvation. It will not be easy, but you are heading in the right direction. There is a place of rest, and there is work to be done, but now you are not alone! "I will never leave you nor forsake you," says Jesus. "I can do ALL things through Jesus Christ who strengthens me," says the apostle Paul... and now YOU can too!

Believe in Christ, lead a righteous life, God love you, i love you guys too.

Till then.

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